The Thief of Joy: Overcoming the Comparison Trap
My wife and I were talking about our career paths and aspirations. The conversation drifted to comparing our current situations to those of others we perceive as more “successful.” I’ve certainly tumbled down that doom spiral of negative thinking before. Fortunately, we had the presence of mind to shut that thread down and refocus.
Coincidentally, that same morning while driving on the freeway, I noticed a message on the back window of a truck ahead of me: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” It wasn’t just a standard bumper sticker but a custom-made decal. They really wanted this message out into the world. Talk about serendipity.
While I’ve heard this phrase before and even shared it with others, seeing it as a literal sign felt like the universe was sliding into my DMs. Okay, not subtle. Got it, message received.
Understanding a concept is one thing; putting it into practice is another. Here are some strategies I find helpful to stay positive and focused.
Recognize that there will always be someone more successful, and the person I envy likely envies someone else.
- Use others’ achievements as inspiration. What action can I take to learn from and emulate their success?
- Focus on the present moment. The future is something that only exists in my mind. I will never be anywhere but right now. Do I really want to spend this time focused on something I have no control of? Instead, I should concentrate on what I can do right now to progress towards my goals.
- Embrace the discomfort of striving for more. If I’m not creating at the level I want, if my reach exceeds my grasp, this is actually a good thing. It’s a sign that I’m not settling for mediocrity. Complacency never led to greatness.
Anyway, stop fixating on others’ successes and instead channel that energy into creating something meaningful.
Favorite Thing I Sculpted This Month
I’m not a sculptor but the handful of times I’ve made something, I’ve had fun doing it. I’d love to take a class. I bought some air-drying clay a few months back on my birthday and just now got around to using it.
I love animation maquettes. I’ve been wanting to make a head sculpt of Niles for some time. I find drawing him from certain angles a bit tricky. So I figured having some real life reference would be a great tool.
I made two sculpts. One with his mouth closed, the other open. I wasn’t going for perfect with these. I just want to be able to see him in 3D. So they are fairly crude but they hit the mark. I’ve already used them to go back and fix some drawings that hung me up.
JB your next!
Favorite Thing I Didn’t Draw Sculpt This Month
Keeping with the sculpting theme, I love the style and pop of these sculptures by Jon Hartman. He works in Sculpey Premo which is kind of like high-end Playdo. Meaning it’s clay but premixed colors. You can see how vibrant it is with his work which elevates the cartoony aesthetic. Really fun stuff.
Family Stuff
Sophia celebrated her birthday this month. We dropped the kids off with my brother then got a couples massage and went to her favorite restaurant. It was nice to go out. It can be difficult.
Sophia also went on a road trip with a friend for a week and a half. The girls took Penny and I watched River. It was an interesting dynamic with so much one-on-one time with River. He understandably favors mom so I was a little concerned he’d have trouble with the separation but he did fantastic. Nightly phone calls certainly helped.
Penny has started to crawl. She’s been kind of scooting backwards for a bit now. She had figured out how to get on all fours and rock a bit but would always plop on her but instead of moving forward. She finally figured it out and has managed to move forward a few steps before plopping down again. So any day now she’s going to be off to the races and the baby gates are going to have to go back up.
And that’s what’s up! Thanks for reading.
-Josh
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